OK ladies...need some professional advice on my lady love?

I have a relationship with what I consider the woman I was meant to be with. We have been together for over a year and a half. Unfortuantly there is one small problem. I am single and she is ...well...married. Her marriage is pretty dismal from what I see. We are so very much alike it is scary, same thoughts, same likes, same everything except she has not gotten the courage to leave this individual. I'm sure there are some of you that think ';Oh that's wrong';..but I believe...and have seen that there are some things worth fighting for. So tell me ladies...what would make you make the choice to live a better life? And no I don't mean money and things. I mean commitment, caring, adventure through life together. I have all the money I need....what I don't have is her. Should I stay or should I say ';I did my best..apparently that wasn't good enough'; And for the record we are both middle aged.OK ladies...need some professional advice on my lady love?
You ask what it is that will make her make the choice to leave her marriage and be with you. You need to understand that as sweet as you are, you are not giving her the motivation to LEAVE and CHOOSE you.





You are far too available to her. She is not making that choice because you have set it up in such a way that she doesn't have to! You are allowing her to continue to see you and see him (her husband) too. You need to step out ot the picture. If life with her husband is as dismal as you say it is, and life with you is far more appealing, the surest way to make her see that with any clarity is to drop her. If she has a very depressing marriage, right now, your presence in her life is what is making it bearable. Unwittingly, what you are actually doing is providing her with the light relief and emotional fulfillment that her marriage lacks. If you weren't there doing that, she'd be likely to FEEL THE LACK in her marriage, and do something about it. Whether she chooses to address it with her husband, seek counselling and try to resolve it with him, or whether she chooses to abandon the cause and seek her heart's desire outside her marriage is up to her. But you need to inspire her to make that choice. You need to stop allowing her to have her cake and eat it too. It's not right for her, for her husband, and it's certainly not right for you. Why are you settling for the crumbs? You're old enough to know better, and so is she. If she is a decent woman, she will resolve her marriage FIRST before she starts seeking to pursue a relationship with you. I understand that you have a wonderful and very intense connection, but she's married. It can't go on like this. She has to make a decision about her marriage first, and you can't be part of that picture. I'm sure you don't want to be accused of being the cause of her marriage breakup anyway, as it sounds like her affair with you is a by-product of prior, unresolved issues that were going on in her marriage.





I think you should pull back a bit. Then she'll be forced to look at her marriage and resolve it in whatever way she feels to be right (and you must accept that). But I think she'll come running.OK ladies...need some professional advice on my lady love?
Seems like she wants you both. She wont leave her husband, so maybe she still loves him. Tough situation, but you are the third wheel here. Since she wont leave her husband, you should end the relationship with her. Yes, it will hurt but you can move on. And find someone who is available.
Honesty... she can't leave her husband because she dosen't want to. Either it is because she still loves him and doesn't want to give up on him or she feels that she will be a failure if she gives up on her marriage. Move on... there are plenty of fish in the sea
I think you should remove yourself from the picture and let her make her choice. You don't want her to divorce because of you, that would be wrong and a bad start to your relationship!
Hey! Why didn't they make two Yogi Bears?

















Because they made a Boo Boo~!!!





:o)








I have no resolve to your Q~ Sorry... Hope you like my lil joke!
You should not stay.
I guess if you are both middle-aged and money is not an issue, you have to decide if you love each other enough.....because it won't be easy.





She has to consider the consequences of a divorce (if she has kids) and what her ex-husband can do to her and her reputation. If you live in a small town, gossip can be lethal, and it could poison your relationship.





You will both start with a lot of baggage....Especially if there are kids involved.





But...since I am middle-aged too, and a divorced mother of a pre-teen, I can totally understand the thrill of having a wonderful person in your life. You feel like this relationship is a gift, and you cherish it and enjoy the time you spend with this person. Yes, I can relate; so I'd ask you to really think if this is it...IF she is ';the one';.





You both need to be totally honest with each other, and you need to know if you are both committed to this relationship and each other, too. Because if one of you falters, the other one will feel like they have been fooled....and that is the beginning of the end.





So be careful....and try to do what is best for you. Use both your head and your heart when making this decision.


Good luck.